7,107 Reasons Not to Go Home

Jeepney Ridin'

2010-05-31T16:11:00.000-07:00

"Jeepneys are the iconic Filipino mode of transportation. The modern Jeepney stemmed from when some resourceful individuals modified WWII surplus army jeeps for public transport during the withdrawal of American troops from the Philippines. Most jeepneys are brightly colored, and many have elaborately painted designs on the side, in addition to chromed-out hood ornaments."

-Excerpt from "Philippines Survival Guide - Part 1"

If you are lacking in funds and still need to get around Manila, Jeepneys may be a viable option. I was pretty much forced into riding one "as part of the natural progression of being poor" (a phrase stolen from my good friend Dan Barmats). One great thing about jeepneys is that unlike taxis, they will not try to unceremoniously screw you over.

As with anything else, safety is an important issue. I covered most of the essentials dealing with public transportation safety in "Philippines Survival Guide - Part 1," but I'll give a quick recap: Don't flash your cash/jewelry/iPhone/anything of value, dress down, try to speak ONLY in Tagalog, get to know the routes and landmarks, and don't look like a tourist chump (relax and put on your "everyday face"). Also, the driver will probably be darting in and out of traffic, all while collecting fares, making change, and checking in the rear view mirror to see that everyone has paid their fee. This is normal, do not freak out. Jeepney drivers are some of the most talented drivers I have ever seen, and they do this stuff every day. Having a heart attack will not help you get to your destination any safer.

No, I am not trying to be an urban ninja, although I admit I would probably be a pretty badass one. ;-) If traffic is bad, you might want to wear one of these masks (a lot of tricycle drivers also wear them), or you can opt to put a towel or a handkerchief over your mouth and nose. Because jeepneys are open-air and nasty traffic means noxious fumes, you might want to invest a couple dollars into something like this, especially if you ride them a lot.

While on most jeepneys the main thing you will have to contend with is a huge crowd of people stuffed in with you, on occasion you may find some more unconventional passengers, such as the gentleman above. I have seen everything from a child holding a baby duckling to a man with a pretty large partitioned cage filled with various birds to a worker bringing a bit of scaffolding with him.

Generally, here is how riding a jeepney works: First, look for the correct jeep. Their individual routes are painted in big letters on the side of the jeepney. Flag one down, and when it stops, squeeze into a seat. Say “bayad po” (more on this later) and pass up your fare money. When it eventually gets to the driver or his “cashier,” he will hold it up in the air, and then you state where you are going and how many people you are paying for. After that they will pass back your change, and you say “para po” or knock the roof (if it’s really loud) when you want them to stop.

The funny thing is that depending on the jeepney driver, you may be saying numbers in three different languages - English, Spanish, and Tagalog. Usually, the number of passengers you are paying for will be said in Tagalog, and the payment amount will be said in either English (spoken with a Filipino accent) or Spanish. Unless you are going REALLY far, most jeepney fares are under 20 pesos, so pretty much learn your Spanish numbers up to 20 and you are good to go.

What follows are some basic “Survival Tagalog” words and phrases that you may hear/use when riding on a jeep.

Isa – one

Dalawa – two

Tatlo – three

Apat – four

Lima - five

Saan ka pupunta? – Where are you going?

Saan ang (destination)? – “Where is (the destination)?”

Magkano sa (destination)? – “How much to go to (destination)”

Bayad po – Say this when you pass up your fare

Bayad daw – Say this when you are passing up someone else’s fare

Yung sukli ko po – “My change, please.” If the driver hasn’t passed your change back

Binigyan kita ng 20 pesos – “I gave you 20 pesos”

Malayo pa ba ang (destination)? – “Is (the destination) still far away?”

Para po/Sandali lang po – “Stop/Just a moment” When you want the driver to stop

Salamat po – “Thank you”

One final note:

I know it sounds counter-intuitive, but whenever you can always try to get into a loaded jeepney. It will get you where you want to go a lot faster. The less people in the jeepney, the slower the driver will go and the more stops he will make, extending your trip.

REMEMBER - "A full jeepney is a fast jeepney!"

Enjoy your travels and take care!

Island Spotlight: Les Caraibes

2010-04-03T11:03:00.000-07:00

As soon as I got out of the car, I was overwhelmed by the stunning atmosphere of Les Caraibes Resort. I don't usually like resorts too much, but I instantly knew I would love it here.

The shoreline was gorgeous, and the weather was perfect. I had a chance to kayak, and the view of the mountains and coastline created a total Kodak moment. Unfortunately, I didn’t have my camera because a slight spill into the pristine waters would have destroyed it, so no breath-taking pictures were taken at that moment. The friends I was with played volleyball on the beach court, and I have to admit, while competition was heated at times, everyone had fun. We maintained the same teams every game, which did nothing to take away from the competitive attitude.

After finishing each volleyball session, I would always make sure to take a running jump into the lightly rolling waves to cool off. The placid waters were like a rippling sheet of glass; I could see the sandy bottom at all times. There were also plenty of flat stones scattered in the sand, so I got to work a little bit on my stone-skipping as well. After tossing about every rock I could find, I noticed a couple henna artists that had a stall by the beach, and I got Superman’s “S” on my chest. I couldn’t resist; I had a dream the night before of getting the exact same henna work. Who am I to argue with fate?

After hours of mercilessly conquering volleyball opponents, fighting the ocean’s might, flinging small boulders, and becoming a superhero, it shouldn’t even be necessary to mention that I worked up quite an appetite. Luckily, the kitchen staff at Les Caraibes is top notch. Every meal was a new adventure, and I zestfully devoured anything the waiters put in front of me.

Choosing a favorite is next to impossible, because each dish seemed to get better and better. Spicy crawfish, crispy eggrolls, succulent glazed pork, expertly seasoned fish garnished with lemon and vegetables, and delicious desserts such as a refreshing frozen fruit crumble and rich leche flan stick out in my mind as some legendary indulgences to my taste buds that I experienced that weekend.

After taking the obligatory post-feast nap and enjoying another healthy dose of sea breeze and the cool waters, the sun started to creep down and I knew another dimension of fun was soon to begin. Slowly but surely, people started drifting into the resort’s bar area, where upbeat music was playing and a small group of guys was busy perfecting their darts game. The great ambiance was only surpassed by the skills of the bartenders. Any drink my buddies or I could think of, they were able to pull it together and do it with style. I witnessed everything served from margaritas to B-52 shooters to Pastis (a French drink that is like the little brother of absinthe). If beer is more your speed, the bartenders are also experts at prying off bottle caps, so you can rest easy.

For those who prefer not to drink alcohol at all, I highly recommend Les Caraibes’ refreshing selection of shakes. The flavors range from fruit-based like pineapple or mango with a splash of grenadine (my all-time favorite shake) to ice cream-based shakes filled with chocolate-banana goodness (a close second favorite).

When the long night of revelry and merrymaking with my friends was at a close, I retired to my welcoming and comfortable bed with amazing memories and slowly drifted off to sleep looking forward to more adventures the next day.

I had an outstanding time at Les Caraibes, and I have no reservations about recommending it to anyone and everyone as a phenomenal vacation spot. If you want to contact them to visit or book a room, here is their website for more information:

http://www.lescaraibesresort.com/

I'll Take You Down To Chinatown

2010-03-22T21:54:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, my friends and I took a trip to Manila's Chinatown, called Binondo, for a food adventure (aka foodtrip)! It was an amazing experience. We were led by Mr. Karl Go, who seems to have an encyclopedia of knowledge stored in his head about the food and history of the area. Read on, and I'll take you on a photo tour of Binondo, with info on where to go and what to eat. The pictures and some commentary are mine, but I've also included informative captions/descriptions that were provided by Karl. Enjoy!

Karl Go: Manila Chinatown! A land where Chinese and Filipino cultures live intertwined in one another's existence, each one complementing and strengthening the other.

What delights and gastronomic adventures lie within? The answers lie beyond the Filipino-Chinese Friendship Arch that stoically stands in tribute to Filipino-Chinese cooperation and mutual coexistence.

First stop was a streetside vendor that sold us some delicious fried siopao. I've had the regular variety, but this was the first time I've had the pleasure of tasting the fried version. The filling looked like meat, tasted like meat, but was actually tofu!

KG: Fried siopao. Its siopao. Its fried. It's wonderful. :) Shanghai cuisine is characterized by its liberal use of oil in cooking, but whoever stared at a bun filled with meatlike goodness and thought, ''what if i brown that first?'' was a mad genius.

KG: [Picture on Left] ''Ma Mian Di Yi Jia'' - First House of Ma's Noodles

This 80-year old restaurant epitomizes how hard work, good cooking, and secret recipes can leave a lasting imprint on a country's entire food culture.

Established in 1930, this restaurant was founded by Ma Mon Luk, a Cantonese immigrant who peddled his hand-made noodles much like Filipino taho vendors (on foot, shoulders weighed down by a tin canister-bucket of soup on one side and noodles on the other.) He died with his shoulders permanently crooked, but he died a successful man, even enriching the Filipino language with a new word: mami, from ''ma'' (his last name) and ''mi'' (noodles).

[Picture on Right] The legendary Ma's noodles. See that little bowl behind the glass of oolong tea? Yup, that one dripping with saucy goodness. That little bowl holds all the secrets in the epicurean universe.

Eating method: Dip noodles in sauce. Add sauce to soup. Savor.

KG: Ongpin street in Binondo, Manila Chinatown.

Thrown out of the walled city of Intramuros by Manila's Spanish elite, the Chinese made a home in a community that grew over the centuries. Now a tightly packed jumble of businesses and domiciles, the apparent chaos is only to the uninitiated eye: every street in Binondo is organized according to what is sold there. One street may specialize in fabrics, the next in medical supplies, while another may boast glass and aluminum wares.

One street rules them all, and in the urban sprawl binds them: ongpin street, where you can find a little of everything.

KG: [Top Picture] A temple to Guan Yu, hero of Chinese history, legend, and stalwart mainstay of the Dynasty Warrior series of games. Yes, he's real, and he's the god of war, business, and loyalty.

Taoist concepts revolve around personal understanding of creation, and venerate many long-gone heroes and philosophers by honoring them after death. Remembered for their deeds, their spirits are thought to have influence over specific areas of human experience, allowing them to influence events much like patron saints.

Anyone can walk in and light incense to show your respect. Walk over to the right, light three sticks, face the altar, and place the incense in the huge brazier when you’re done. Don’t forget to make a wish (and a small donation). Who knows, maybe an ancient spirit of warfare and success may just hear your words.

[Bottom Picture]: A thing about Chinese: they are remarkably tolerant of the beliefs of other cultures. Don't feel comfortable lighting incense? Not a problem: light some candles instead, and send a request via another message service. It'll still get there.

KG: [Top Picture] Ah! What is Chinese food without dumplings?

Dumplings (jiaozi in chinese) are part of the Northern tradition of Chinese cooking, where wheat is a staple. Boiled in water or steamed over a slow fire, jiaozi are distinguished from Cantonese-style dimsum by nature of its wrapping and preparation method. Traditionally made by hand, dumplings warm the heart with their delicious simplicity (and the ears, if ancient lore is to be believed).

[Middle Picture] The wrapping and the filling. Go ladies! Thousands of years of Chinese tradition are in your capable (Filipino) hands!

[Bottom Picture] The dumpling, last survivor of a whole plate of 14, which heroically gave themselves over to feed a greater need. Oh, and the whole plate costs 100 pesos, or about $2. you will be fondly remembered!

KG: One of the oldest churches in the Philippines, 427-year old binondo church has survived multiple earthquakes and wartime bombings to stand as an example of Catholic faith in the Philippines.

Positioned at the center of San Lorenzo Ruiz Plaza, Binondo Church is a monument to Spanish colonial life in the Philippines, when communities were built around a central church and plaza to allow for a place to gather for comfort and security. The bells would be rung in times of crisis, whereupon the priests would stand side-by-side with the community heads as they dealt with whatever emergencies had emerged.

The majesty of the church also emphasizes an important fact: the Spanish used religion as a means to pacify the warrior hearts of the native Filipinos. Won over by the mysteries and power of organized religion, the Filipinos embraced Christianity and wove it into the fabric of everyday life like no other people in Asia.

KG: When you're in Binondo, you just have to stop by Eng Bee Tin.

Packed and filled to the rafters with Chinese delicacies and snack foods, it is the perfect place to sample some of the specialty pastry and rice cake concoctions Binondo Chinatown is famous for. For New Year, try niangao (tikoy), a rice cake eaten to celebrate family ties.

Feeling romantic? Grab some lotus seed moon cakes (yue bing) for the mid-autumn festival celebrating the most beautiful full moon of the year. Walk hand-in-hand with your loved one as you admire the moon and munch on these special cakes.

And of course, you simply have to try the hopia. A snack cake infused with Filipino-Chinese traditions, it comes in a variety of flavors from the mundane (mung bean) to the exotic (pineapple and ube, a purple root crop that tastes better than it sounds).

This is the first purple fire-truck I have ever seen, and definitely the most fashion-conscious. Why settle for just saving lives, when you can save them in style? Also, if you look at the decal on the right, it advertises that you can TEXT IN when you see a blaze. That's also a first for me. "hey fire dept thers a fire on d nxt street dwn. com over n spray sum h2o on it. lolz."

KG: Part of the proceeds of Eng Bee Tin helps support the renowned Binondo Volunteer Fire Department, who pride themselves on being among the first at any fire anywhere in Manila, even blazes two cities away. Water cannons away!

We were starting to get full, but we knew the only way to go was to loosen our belts and hit the next stop, where a symphony for our taste buds awaited. Karl made sure to order their specialties for us, except for one in particular. Its called "Cow Whip." Let me give you a hint - lady cows don't have one.

KG: [Top Picture] The Estero. Simply put, one of the best kept-secrets of Binondo Chinatown. Once you've found this place, you can truly say you've eaten at Binondo.

The open-air facade and rundown appearance hides the fact that this is one of the places where you can get truly authentic Chinese food at the most unbelievable of prices. A huge meal for 10 cost 850 pesos ($1.70 a head), and thats a meal with chicken, beef, noodles and rice.

Don't be afraid to try anything on the menu. Even the most pedestrian of dishes tastes different when steeped in the wok of true Chinese cooking.

[Bottom Picture] What one diner managed to pile on his plate as the food was being devoured.

Food is served in communal plates, with medium servings good for 3-4 people and large servings for 5-6 people. Pick one dish from every major food group and dig in to your heart's content.

Pictured here is beef with broccoli, a filipino-named cantonese noodle dish called pansit canton, and deliciously spicy Szechuan chicken.

KG: [Top Picture] This greasy spoon is more than just a neighborhood eatery-- it's a neighborhood institution.

Now run under the name ''Cafe Mezzanine'', many still fondly remember the times when the former Chuan Kee eatery would offer a multitude of delights in the Filipino ''turo-turo'' (point-point) manner: you point at something you fancy, and eat it as its placed on your plate almost immediately.

Despite the changes, the food has thankfully stayed the same through several decades. It may not be the absolute best, but almost everything Filipino-Chinese cuisine has to offer can be found here, making it a return destination for the serious food completist.

[Bottom Picture] Zongzi (machang in Fujian Chinese) and nuomi fan (kiam pong): both rice-based, but different in approach.

Zongzi (middle of right pic) is a glutinous snack/breakfast food heartily filling and satisfying. Boiled in leaves and then served hot, it has a distinct flavor that can be further enhanced with an unconventional seasoning: ketchup! (trust me)

Nuomi fan (right side of right pic) is a version of Chinese fried rice you simply have to try in the Philippines. Enhanced by Filipino tinkering and known locally as kiampong, it goes perfectly with kikiam (left side of right pic), a Filipino version of a Chinese pork-tofu roll dish.

As a side note, kikiam is a ubiquitous street food staple in the Philippines, sold by ever-present corner vendors who fry it in oil and serve it on sticks. Nothing beats the crispy-chewy-tangy texture of the real thing in Chinatown, though.

KG: Believe it or not, walking is truly the best way to experience Manila Chinatown firsthand. Narrow streets and congested walkways all guarantee that driving a vehicle here is a surefire way to raise one's blood pressure up a few notches.

Feel the pulse of the city in the background with every step into the heart of Binondo Chinatown!

Alas, all good things must come to an end. After day filled with food that caused our taste buds to party almost nonstop, we finally made our way out of the crowded streets of Binondo. As full as my belly was, I couldn't shake the craving for more!

Looks Familiar. . .

2010-03-21T05:21:00.000-07:00

What follows are some funny examples of copyright infringement that companies get away with here in the Philippines. Do this many other places in the world, and you could have a lawsuit on your hands. Enjoy!

I especially like this one, because based on the packaging, it even looks like a spoof (but its not). Its a totally shameless imitation, which made it all the more of an entertaining find. The name of the product is "HI-RO" by the company "Fibisico"! It gets better. The tagline says "New Look, Same ORIGINAL Taste" (Emphasis added). Wow. Gotta love it.

This was taken at Hundred Islands, one of the prettiest places I have ever been. I am almost positive I saw Hugh Heffner in that outrigger canoe. Or maybe it was just an gray-haired, wrinkly German tourist in an old bathrobe and a Speedo. I guess we'll never know.

I have to admit that I was more than a little surprised to see Mario, everyone's favorite video game plumber, making sales pitches for DiY (kind of like ACE Hardware in the Philippines). I guess Nintendo just wasn't paying him enough residuals from Super Mario Bros 3 and MarioKart. Hey, even protagonists from 80s-era video games gotta eat.

I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I did when I first saw these in person! A new post is coming soon. I want to thank all of the people that have been viewing my page and showing support! Keep spreading the word!

Philippines Survival Guide - Part 2: Filipino English VS American English

2010-03-11T02:33:00.000-08:00

You really, really, REALLY have to go to the restroom. You are rushing around the mall, asking random workers if they know where the bathroom is, and all you're getting is blank stares. After a few tries, you find a security guard that speaks fluent English. You ask him if he knows where you can find a restroom. To your surprise, you are hit with yet another blank stare. How can this be?

While a large percentage of the Filipino population speaks English either fluently or at least conversationally, there are still some differences between the American and Filipino varieties of the language. What follows is a list that will hopefully help you know WHAT KIND of English to use when you are roaming the streets of Manila.

Thanks to Kuya Warren for helping me out with this post!

Filipino English - American English

Accomplish - (v) to complete a form. Ex) "Please accomplish this form"
Aircon - Air Conditioner/AC
Already — Filipinos use this word to state that they have finished doing something, whether it was before or after a deadline. In the US, one would use "already" when something is done ahead of schedule. Also, Filipinos tend to put "already" at the end of a sentence.
Ex) The statement "I already bought the CD" would be said "I bought the CD already."
Artist/Artista — A movie/television actor/actress.
Batch - Class
Batchmate - Classmate
Barbecue — Grilled meat chopped into pieces and cooked on a stick. In the US, however, barbecue is pretty much anything grilled.
Bedspace — A rented out area of a home that a boarder, known as a "bedspacer," sleeps.
Blowout - to treat to a meal
Bottomless — Free drink refills
Brownout - Blackout/Power-outtage
Buck — a peso, rather than a dollar
Buy one, take one - Buy one, get one free
By and by — Later
Calling card - Business card
Canteen - Cafeteria
Carnapping - Carjacking; car theft. A carnapper is a carjacker or car thief
Chinoy - Chinese-Filipino
Chit - a restaurant bill
Colgate - any brand of toothpaste
Comfort Room/CR — Bathroom/restroom
Cope up with - Cope with
Dine-in - Also means "for here." Even at a food kiosk, the worker will ask you if you want to "dine-in," despite the fact there is nowhere to sit down. You might not even be inside a building!
Double-action bullet - A hollow point, or expanding bullet
Eat-All-You-Can - All-You-Can-Eat
Every now and then - Often
Fill up the form - Fill out the form
For a while - "Please wait." Usually used when talking on the telephone.
Get down/Go down (vehicle) - To "get off"
Gimmick - A night out with friends, especially at a bar or club
Girly Bar - Strip club
Go ahead - Leave in advance. Ex) "I'll go ahead" means that you are going now, before everyone else
Helper - Any combination of a maid, cook, and/or nanny who usually works and lives in their employer's home
If ever - If it happens
Jingle - To urinate
Jogging pants - Sweat pants

KJ - Kill-joy; someone that is a downer and ruins all the fun
Masteral - Master's degree
McDo - McDonalds
Middle Name - Usually, the middle name is the mother's maiden name
Motor - Motorcycle
Officemate - Co-worker
Open/Close the light - Turn on/off the light
Outing- referring to taking a trip out of town, specifically to the beach
Pentel Pen - Any brand of marker
Ref - Refrigerator
Remembrance - Something to remember a person or place by; a souvenir
Revival - Cover version of a song
Rotonda - Roundabout
Rubber shoes - Athletic shoes/sneakers
Salvage - Assassinate
Sari-sari store - a neighborhood convenience store
Simple - Modest, not pretentious
Slang - bad pronunciation or strong accent
Slippers - Flip-flops
Sounds - Music
Take-away - Take-out (food)
The other day - The day before yesterday
Thrice - More commonly used in the Philippines than the phrase "three times"
Tissue Paper - Toilet paper

Traffic - heavy traffic. Ex) "It's so traffic"
Tricycle - A small motorcycle with a sidecar hired for transportation
Village - A gated community
Xerox - Any brand of copy machine, or to make a copy
Yaya - See Helper (above)

Have You Seen These Tasty Treats at Your Local Gas Station?

2010-03-01T06:17:00.000-08:00

When most Americans think of stopping by their local convenience store for a snack, they're usually expecting to find candy bars, Slurpees, potato chips and, of course, energy drinks. Here are a few items that my U.S. readers may not be able to find every day at their local Quik-E-Mart. Its interesting to note that four out of the five snacks listed are found in a store that also operates in our own backyard: 7-Eleven.

Served with hot chili, calamansi, and drowning in soy sauce, siomai is the perfect snack for the late-night munchies, great pulutan (beer snack), and is even good for staying awake after a night-long tambay (hang-out session). In the last case, just make sure to add plenty of extra chili to get the maximum desired effect.

One standby common in many Filipino convenience stores is siopao, the undeniably delicious Chinese treat. These are stuffed with your choice of meat (some even have egg), and served with a side of either sweet or spicy sauce to add to the tantalizing goodness. I am really going to miss being able to pick one of these up for a quick on-the-go snack when I get back to the States.

Usually, if I were to ask any of my U.S. friends what kind of meat they could get at the nearest gas station, the answers would probably be limited to beef jerky, hot dogs, and Taquitos (the last one is debatable). Who knew that you would be able to get a Korean beef meal with rice that's so good, its "Stew Delicious?" Who even knew you could get rice at 7-Eleven?

Sunflower seeds are a staple for baseball players, and they also make a great snack when you're in a hurry. If you want to try a substitute that has plentiful amounts of A, C, D, K, and B-complex vitamins, why not swap melon seeds for the traditional sunflower variety? If I haven't sold you on the health benefits, rest assured that they're delicious. And with plenty of vitamin A, they will help protect your lungs if you're a daily jeepney and tricycle rider like myself.

Its amazing what you can make with the cash crop of the American Midwest. Corn on the cob, creamed corn, diced corn, corn bread, corn chips, corn meal, corn and peas, corn Slurpees. . . What?!? Yep, this staple vegetable has successfully went from healthy status to an icy, sugar-enhanced junk food. By far, this is the crowning jewel in the Ministop snack series. All you have to do to get one is fly halfway around the world to Japan or the Philippines.

While a little different, I can say with confidence that all of these snacks rival or even surpass the standard fare of Western convenience stores. If you're ever overseas and happen to find something different than the usual Slim Jim's and Snickers bars, don't be afraid to try it! You might even leave wanting more.

Hotdog + Waffle = Delicious?

2010-02-24T09:27:00.000-08:00

Many of my Stateside readers may have never thought of combining a breakfast food with a lunchtime grill favorite, but I can assure you that whoever thought of it was a very enlightened man (or woman). At first look, I was rather skeptical as to the potential of this Filipino specialty. However, the time happened to be past the early morning, but not quite noon, so I figured "Why not?" I am glad I took a chance on this tasty snack three years ago; it satiated my hunger and soothed my soul. In that moment of the first savory bite, the world actually seemed to make a little more sense. And for the record, they're great at any time of the day. :-)

You can find these perfect little snacks at about any mall, and some street vendors. You can also get ham and cheese waffles, and dessert chocolate-stuffed waffles, among other varieties. I know it sounds odd, but go for it! You won't be disappointed.

Would You Take This Ambulance?

2010-02-21T06:44:00.000-08:00

These are actual pictures I took in Manila about a week ago. Conflict of interest, don't you think? :)

Philippines Survival Guide - Part 1: Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (Or Maybe Just the Last Two)

2010-02-20T09:17:00.000-08:00

Squeezed tightly into a brightly-painted passenger jeep that was blasting a techno version of Richard Marx’s “Right Here Waiting for You,” it suddenly occurred to me that only a couple years ago, I would never have been able to imagine myself packed into this manically-driven commuter vehicle made for 16, but holding 20 (including two guys hanging on outside the back aperture). What follows is a brief summation of various means of transportation around Manila, Philippines, and some advice that will hopefully help prevent you from getting ripped off/taken advantage of/sold to a Southeast Asian slave trader in exchange for a roll of spearmint Mentos and half a pack of cigarettes.

The “Lay of the Land”

Manila traffic is notoriously horrendous. Driving in between the lines designated for your lane and obeying the few traffic lights in existence are, at best, considered gentle suggestions. Almost getting sideswiped by a charter bus goes from a traumatic experience to an almost routine occurrence. While, in most parts of the US at least, it is widely endorsed that one should be a “defensive driver,” in Manila, survival necessitates that you do the opposite. Drivers in the Philippines are either the absolute worst drivers in the world, or the best of the best. On one hand, they break every single traffic rule known to man on a constant basis. On the other hand, despite this seemingly reckless behavior, I have seen surprisingly few wrecks, and even my Filipino friends that live here in Manila have agreed that automobile accidents are not as common as they should be.

Jeepney

Jeepneys are the iconic Filipino mode of transportation. The modern Jeepney stemmed from when some resourceful individuals modified WWII surplus army jeeps for public transport during the withdrawal of American troops from the Philippines. Most jeepneys are brightly colored, and many have elaborately painted designs on the side, in addition to chromed-out hood ornaments. In fact, just a couple days ago, I saw both sides of a parked jeepney painted with an ornately designed image of Jesus. I was impressed at the driver’s piety until I happened to see an even more detailed airbrush of Naruto (the anime cartoon ninja) on the hood of the same vehicle. I guess sometimes Jesus alone just isn’t enough to protect some people from Metro Manila’s traffic.

While jeepneys are a great deal (a 120 peso cab ride versus about 17 pesos on a jeep), this mode of transportation is not recommended for tourists new to the Philippines and traveling alone. However, commuting this way could be viable if you’re familiar with the jeep routes and have a basic command of Tagalog, you’re traveling with a local, or *ahem* you were forced to learn how to take the jeepneys when your girlfriend visited and you blew all of your money running around the country with her (love you, babe). In any case, there are a few key points to remember when taking jeeps. First, dress down. Jeepneys are generally the mode of transportation for the proletariat, so you do not want to draw attention, which could make you a target for would-be muggers and thieves. Second, do not carry large amounts of cash on jeepneys; only take what you need for that day. Third, try to avoid the “excited tourist face.” Don’t look too thrilled to be there. Business as usual, OK? Finally, remember to keep your cell phone in your pocket/purse/bag. It’s always best to minimize temptation. If you follow these guidelines and can speak the basic Tagalog needed for jeepney travel without butchering the accent too much, this could be a cheap alternative to taxis.

Taxi

Always be VERY WARY of taxi drivers, they are notorious for ripping people off. This is especially true when you are coming from the airport, so keep your guard up. Remember, if one cab seems sketchy, just get out and wait for another one! It will not take long, I promise. You might even get amused watching for taxis. I have seen taxi names ranging from the reverent “Jesus Saves” to the slightly less idealistic “Make Me Rich!” There are three main ways that cabbies will try to get more from you than the correct fare owed.

The first way taxis will try to take your hard-earned pesos is by asking for a flat rate. Never, I repeat NEVER, settle for any unmetered fares. The offered rate is typically at least twice the normal rate. Once, I was traveling from Eastwood (a posh area with shops, condos, and restaurants) to a bar in Timog. The cabbie, obviously spurred on by the fact that his customer was a white boy, proceeded to offer me a rate that was more than three times the normal amount! I ended up arguing with him in Tagalog, which seemed to shock him a little. Finally, after I called the cabbie racist for charging me more because I’m a “puti” (white person), he turned on the meter and we had a rather peaceful ride. In retrospect, I should have followed my own advice and just gotten out right away; it wasn’t worth the trouble. No one’s perfect.

Taxi drivers will also separate you from your money by pretending they do not have change for your big bills. Or if they do, they will probably only be able to give you enough that would leave them an extremely generous tip. Nine times out of ten, they probably have the money, but “Oh shoot, no change. I guess you’ll just have to give me that whole 100 pesos” is much more appealing. Make sure to have an abundant supply of small bills so you don’t have to worry about being in that situation.

Finally, taxis will extract more pesos from you than they should by using fast meters. There is nothing you can really do about this, save choosing your cab wisely. Two cab companies I have always had great experiences with are MGE (white and green, black lettering) and Reno (white, red lettering). The drivers from these cab companies have always treated me honestly, and their meters are accurate. You can even call their dispatchers, and they will send a cab to pick you up.
MGE – 3648260 or 3636096 or 3666214 or 3666287
Reno – 029312681

Just to be safe, DO NOT get into a taxi that already has someone else in it. There are a few taxis in Makati (the financial district) that take on multiple clients at once, but it is not a very common practice. It is better to be cautious than to get robbed or kidnapped, as the above tactic has been used in the past to take advantage of tourists and foreigners.

As a final note, an acceptable tip is around 10 pesos. Usually, however, I give a bit more if know for sure that the cabbie gave an honest fare.

Bus

The quality of buses ranges from brand new, air-conditioned charter buses with recliners to decrepit old open-air buses with seats made from wooden slats. How much you pay depends on your desired comfort level. Personally, I prefer to spend an extra couple hundred pesos for a nice bus if I’m taking a long journey to the province areas, such as Bicol or Pangasinan. For shorter rides within Manila, the less illustrious buses aren’t half bad.

As with the Jeepneys, make sure not to flash money, jewelry, or other valuables. Generally, the cheaper buses are the ones that you should be the most careful on, but it is important to practice awareness with any type of public transportation.

One fringe benefit to taking a bus is a slightly increased peace of mind when it comes to flying through traffic. Usually, when in a taxi, jeepney, or privately owned car, the devil-may-care attitude of the drivers as they bore down on you is enough to scare the crap out of anyone, especially visitors new to the Philippines. Being on that hulking mass instead of under it is slightly liberating.

Train/Light Railway

The MRT (Metro Rail Transport) and LRT (Light Railway Transport) are the two main light railway systems in Manila. Traveling on the MRT and LRT will only run you from about 12 to 15 pesos, depending on your destination. While this mode of transportation is very affordable, it is important to keep in mind that if you are traveling during a weekday, especially during rush hour, chances are you will need a running jump to squeeze into the crowded train cars. The standing arrangements are literally body-against-body. If you are looking for a comparable mental image, imagine being livestock in a cattle-car. The only difference is that in cattle cars, there are government restrictions on how many animals you can cram into a little space.

Pickpockets are not rare on this mode of transportation, so make sure to be aware of your valuables. I recommend a small neck pouch worn under your shirt to store cash. Also, if you are carrying a backpack, wear it backwards so that you can see the zippers. I have heard stories from friends here of travelers losing various belongings, including passports, when they do not follow that piece of advice. Remember, if someone is touching your butt, chances are it isn’t just some pervert hoping to cop a feel.

Rental Car

For those adventurous (the best euphemism I can come up with) enough to rent a car in Manila, congratulations. First, you probably have a lot more money than me. Second, you are definitely much, much braver than I am. If you believe you have what it takes to navigate the twisting roads and hazard-strewn highways of Manila, then I salute you. Just remember to wear your seatbelt.

It is important to take into consideration that privately-owned cars are often targets for the corrupt police officers in the city. When you pull off an aggressive driving maneuver that you needed to save your life, don’t be surprised if you see sirens flashing behind your car or an unscrupulous traffic cop flags you down. I have heard that standard bribes to avoid tickets hover around 100 pesos, maybe more, depending on the violation. (Disclaimer: I am not in any way advocating the bribery of civil servants. This is for informative purposes only.)

For those a little more safety conscious, many rental car companies also offer to supply drivers in certain rental packages. This may be a little more expensive, but the peace of mind is probably worth it.

Tricycle and Pedicab

In Manila, these modes of transport are generally for short distances. A tricycle consists of a small motorcycle attached to a sidecar. While it first appears that this vehicle could only accommodate one passenger, I have seen up to seven people piled onto one tricycle. If you are not on a main road, this is a good choice. If in heavy traffic, however, the open-air seating allows exposure to all manner of noxious exhaust fumes.

Pedicabs are the human-powered counterparts of tricycles. For obvious reasons, you want to be even more cautious about what roadways you take with one on than you would with tricycles. With pedicabs, as with tricycles, it is important to negotiate prices, especially if you are not sure what the normal fare is for your trip. There is nothing worse than finding out a couple hours later that you just bought a tricycle driver a couple free beers.

A Parting Note

I am sure some of these pointers are applicable to certain other countries as well, but I am most familiar with the Philippines, so I am writing from that perspective. Also, while certain readers may think that I am being over-pessimistic, rest assured that I truly love the Philippines. Most Filipinos I have met both here and in the US are kind and helpful. The small group of unscrupulous Filipinos I have mentioned in the above article is the exception, not the rule. Good luck on all of your travels, and milk any trip you take for all its worth!